Words and Rules Matter -- What Do We Teach Our Children?

One day, several years ago, I was at Harlem Meer in Central Park.

I noticed a young boy, about 9 or 10-years-old, throwing sticks and small rocks at ducks and geese.

 "They would prefer that you toss treats to them." I said, walking up to him and offering a handful of cracked corn and some bits of whole wheat bread.

The boy looked quizzedly at me, but accepted the offer with a shy "Thank you."

 Within a few minutes, the boy's face widened and broke out in exalted smile and giggles as hungry ducks and geese sauntered up to him, happy to receive the treats from his hand.

 "See? Isn't that better than the animals running away when you scare and throw objects at them? They are like us. They like to eat! And they will remember you as their friend."

 " Yes, I understand." the smiling, jubilant boy replied. "They are so happy now! Can I have some more?"

Children have always been fascinated with ducks and geese. And they particularly like to interact with wildlife.

But there are positive and negative ways to interact with wildlife; especially the semi-tame wildlife of city parks as the above example illustrates.

Take away or discourage one way and children will likely use the other.

In recent weeks there has been much scapegoating and false blame for so-called "rat problems" in city parks placed on bird and squirrel feeders. The Parks Department and city now threaten to pass a new rule to criminalize bird feeding and even throw feeders in jail.

Though the "rule" has not officially passed yet, people are already intimidated and scared to give so much as a peanut to a squirrel.

But what impact do such threatening words and tactics have on children?

Children aren't following news stories, but their parents do.

Certainly no mother is going to give to her child peanuts or bread to feed the birds or squirrels. No mother wants to be fined or arrested.

So what do the kids do now when seeing ducks or geese or squirrels  in the park?

My friend, Laura Taylor was at Harlem Meer the other day.
She did not see anyone feeding birds, but she did photograph one young boy throwing sticks at and chasing two Canada geese.

Unfortunately, with all the demonizing of bird feeders lately, Laura did not feel at liberty (as I was) to offer the boy food to toss instead.

We truly have to ask ourselves what kind of society do we want to be and raise our kids in?

One that punishes, shames and criminalizes compassion or one that exaults and celebrates it?

Pictures below tell the story.
Which child looks happier?
Which child is likely to grow up bullying, intimidating or even assaulting others?
Which child is likely to feel empathy and mercy for the needy? Which child is likely to be generous and giving with others?

Words and "rules" matter.
         
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